dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
