Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
