It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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