Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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