well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
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in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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