the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
operation have a gay friend backfired
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Randomize
