Betty ford says i'm here all night
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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