the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
