Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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