Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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