I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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