i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"