Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize