do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
