yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
