I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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