i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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