Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
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He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
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I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
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