your thong is hanging out like whoa
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
and eventually we just all took our pants off
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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