You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
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