hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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