i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
The air taste purple.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
