very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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