I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
dude i'm inner monologue high
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
