How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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