my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
She's not a foreskin expert like you
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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