I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
