were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
