Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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