ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
