i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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