why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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