What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
