Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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