worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i just google imaged poop.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Randomize
