don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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