wat bout pragnant strippers??
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Randomize
