Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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