I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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