The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Randomize