Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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