If that was your dad, he is hot
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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