a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Randomize
