U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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