I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
