too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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