You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
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i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
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My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.