Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.

  (1-773): View more from Illinois

  Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.

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  (773): I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend. (1-773): Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you. http://tfl.nu/z52z
  Replies (28) Good night (835) Bad night (2693)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot

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  (603): So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot http://tfl.nu/44v5
  Replies (22) Good night (4451) Bad night (635)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...

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  (302): and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare... http://tfl.nu/t5mw
  Replies (21) Good night (572) Bad night (3726)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.

  (512): View more from Texas

  There are margaritas in the freezer still.

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  (210): I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life. (512): There are margaritas in the freezer still. http://tfl.nu/0xfi
  Replies (16) Good night (5528) Bad night (1021)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.

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  (513): Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud. http://tfl.nu/fmdm
  Replies (96) Good night (13476) Bad night (2420)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.

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  (703): The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up. http://tfl.nu/ttp7
  Replies (14) Good night (5705) Bad night (1787)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?

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  (781): on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks? http://tfl.nu/o217
  Replies (6) Good night (3289) Bad night (847)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong

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  (484): i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong http://tfl.nu/1mot
  Replies (21) Good night (1417) Bad night (3968)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?

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  (256): Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!? http://tfl.nu/t31p
  Replies (13) Good night (1369) Bad night (2474)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?

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  (216): there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed? http://tfl.nu/x18l
  Replies (2) Good night (1759) Bad night (1604)
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  (714): View more from California

  Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.

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  (714): Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again. http://tfl.nu/2ucs
  Replies (4) Good night (844) Bad night (2606)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk

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  (757): sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk http://tfl.nu/2uta
  Replies (9) Good night (2358) Bad night (1362)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?

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  (978): Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own? http://tfl.nu/mi3t
  Replies (8) Good night (2041) Bad night (518)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina

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  (414): I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina http://tfl.nu/a948
  Replies (8) Good night (534) Bad night (1032)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls

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  (+44): My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls http://tfl.nu/6im1
  Replies (3) Good night (346) Bad night (561)

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