I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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