What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
