i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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